Episode 948: The Somnambulant Chronologist

Episode 948: The Somnambulant Chronologist

It’s December 21st, 2012. Ibsyn Vale won’t kill himself. He can’t. Why? He’s displaced. Time is linear for him. But, to any and everyone else, he seems to constantly say things out of order. In reality, he’s popping in and out of one timeline: appearing at random points along it.

He does so by “falling asleep” – a process in which, by falling backwards and slamming into the ground, he shifts into another time period. The only apparent pattern is that it’s always “future, past, present…in that order. I see what’s going to happen, I see what did happen and then, inexplicably, I’m right back where I started…well, a little more banged up than usual…”

Mr. Vale attempts to make friends, via knowing what they’re gonna say before they say it. “That doesn’t go over too well. Especially when I spend most of my time trying not to sound pretentious.”

Ibsyn constantly “predicts” political outcomes, though his warnings constantly go unnoticed. Relegated to obscurity, Ibsyn rides cargo ships in the Pacific: helping modern day pirates pilage “…a broken, sad, capitalistic empire…”

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